Happy Holidays!

So I get an email from PetSmart which reads: "Holiday Countdown Event: Save 50% on PetHoliday toys, rawhide, apparel, collars, and more!"

So I scroll down to see what the "and more" is and there's bedding, blankets, gerbils, and snakes...WHAT THE?? GERBILS AND SNAKES?!?!?! yes, that's right...20% off gerbils and 30% off snakes, but you need your PetSmart card for the discount.

I'm sorry, but....Addy will NOT be getting a gerbil nor a snake this year for christmas!

:-P SHEZ

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah....

With all my birthday wishes, also came a lot of "you haven't updated your blogs in awhile."

So, now that midterms are done...I'm vowing to catch you up on the last 4 insanely crazy months of my life...while the Yankees put their heads outta their asses and win Game 2...

So scroll down to the Girls' Weekend posts in June...and read on!

:-P SHEZ

In case you were wondering....

After a thorough search of the, um, backyard....a peach pit was found. :)

bliss is a healthy pupcicle! of course, said healthy pupcicle needs to lose about 10-15 pounds, as she's crept up to to 99lbs! Nothing too bad...vet says since labs tend to gain weight easily as they get older, it's much better (and easier) to do it now...so hopefully with a little more walking and a little less milkbones, we'll be more svelte in no time!

yes, both of us...i completely vow to quit my milkbone habit cold turkey. of course, I don't want to deprave the pupcicle completely, so she'll just get switched to a smaller size of milkbone and not get as many...

:-P SHEZ

Okay, so I'm really starting to believe Sandar's previous comment about me not having the capability of having a drama-free life. The source of drama tonight: the darling pupcicle!

So...guess what she did this evening? She ate a peach--pit and all (however did you guess??). Of course, i get on-line to see what to do and all i find is articles about how peach pits have arsenic in them and are potentially very poisonous (duh!)....call mom. She doesn't answer, so i call new vet.

After 'splaining to receptionist/vet tech/phone answerer that Addy helped herself to my peach (which i stupidly left on table and walked away from, not thinking...like a dumbass), i got a "oooohhh...labs! hold please." Which made me feel slightly better, as my reasoning here--is that if it would be really toxic, she would have said come in now!

The vet gets on phone and confirms that she is a lab and is fully grown and says that she'll be fine. It should go through just fine...just keep an eye on her poo to make sure it comes out (oh joy). If she does start vomiting (double joy), then it means that it got blocked somewhere and bring her in. I then ask if they are poisonous to dogs...and he sighed (probably in exasperation of worried doggie moms who have access to waaaaaaaaay too much information on the world wide web) said no--they're "meant to pass right on through to be dropped and seeded" (nice thought there) of course, usually by horses and cows, but labs are big and as long as they're fully grown, they are fine....

Of course, now i'm watching her like a hawk...so far, she just been snoozing by my feet...

damn dog!

:-P SHEZ

Sometimes You Need To Laugh At The Ridiculousness of It All...

Okay, so I usually don't double dip, or post as it were, with my blogs. However, this one, I feel is double-dip worthy....

http://shezzaspeak.blogspot.com/2009/07/reindeer-beware.html

(or maybe I'm just trying to get you to check out my other blog! i'm kinda sneaky that way! muwahahahahahahaha!)

:-P SHEZ

Snakes Alive!

To quote my friend Sandar (who's name has been changed to protect the guilty) "why does your life have to be filled with drama ALL THE TIME? Can't you just have a quiet day?"

I used to think that it was my friends who had the drama, I just happened to be there when all the shit hit the fan...now, I'm starting to think that perhaps it really, truly is me.

In that spirit, I would like to first apologize to all of my friends for the drama that apparently (through NO desire of my own) follows me around like Pigpen's cloud.

And also in that spirit, have I got a story for you.

Now for those of you reading this and who are not aware: i'm (self-diagnosed, of course) ophiodiophobic (fear of snakes, in case you didn't know/didn't want to look that up on encarta.com)....we're not talking a slight fear or the overall desire to not be around snakes. We're talking stay-up-for-nearly-three-days-because-I-was-sure-there-was-a-snake-in-my-apartment fear of snakes.

Also, I have been living in New York City 1 year, 10 months, 3 weeks, and 3 days and I have NEVER seen a snake. Granted, I do live in Staten Island, but I spend a great deal of time walking around parks and nothing. zip, zilch, nada.

So I'm emptying my coffee filter (SURELY, you didn't think this as going to be a short story...) and spilled some grinds by the trash can. Typical graceful me...can't even hit the trash can. So I'm sweeping up the grind and I notice what I believe to be a black hair band. I reach down to pick it up, when it suddenly MOVED!

BREATHE in with the good air and out with the bad-BREATHE in with the good air and out with the bad-BREATHE in with the good air and out with the bad....because OF COURSE my first thought is SNAKE!

But it's New York City, well, Staten Island--but it's a borough of NYC and has a population of 1 million people, so it's not like being back at the ranch where Granny is the closest neighbor 2 miles away!--so I talk myself into believing that it's an earthworm, a really big, fat, juicy earthworm. I mean, afterall, it's been raining a lot...perhaps it wanted somewhere dry to nap for a bit.

As I am talking myself into this, I have formulated a plan: scoop said earthworm onto dustpan and fling it outside.

Easy, right? Well, after I sweep said earthworm onto the dustpan, it pokes it's pointy little snake head up at me with a "what the fuck are you doing, lady, I'm trying to take a nap?!?!?" I should point out that it was a tiny little snake--only about 12 inches long and the width of a thick pony tail holder, but STILL a snake.

Rather than flinging it outside, it starts to crawl off the dustpan, which is still in my hand. At this point, I scream (like a 5 year old girl) and fling the snake--no, not outside--but..in...to...the...air....

It hits the wall, slides down, and promptly disappears down a hole in my floorboard by the trashcan.

REALLY? REALLY? IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING TO ME????

Oi. only I could move to a city of 8+million people and find a snake in my house.

Of course, landlord is out of town. But not to worry (in case you were), I finally found a use for all those textbooks I kept because I was very sure I needed them...keeping the Sagebiel-Cecil family safe(r).

My biggest fear is that I have this huge den o' snakes under my house....bleh...the thought is truly nauseating, but i'm trying not to think about it too much....but am keeping my shoes on, just in case.

It was a ringneck snake (with an orange stripe) in case you were wondering, which I'm sure you weren't....but I gotta share with SOMEONE!

Meanwhile, my hope is that I traumatized the snake just enough to cross off Jersey Street as one of the top 1,000 places snakes should see before they die.

A girl can dream...a girl can dream...
:-P SHEZ

Girls' Weekend--Day 3

The Best Day!

Once again, beautifully hot :) and so we all pile into the convertible and head to Lynchberg. Home of Jack Daniels. Really, do I need to say more? I think not. But, since you're already here...

Here's a surprising fact and a general head's up before making the hour and half drive to Lynchberg (which we knew and it was totally worth it!): Lynchberg is dry. So that means NO drinking. That's right. No. None. Zip. Zilch. Nada. Not even when you walk to Lynchberg from the distillery--no Lynchberg Lemonades to be bought in Lynchberg. Define irony.

The tour was interesting, the town quaint. We had regular lemonade and ambled about. Bought a few souvenirs. Discovered you can buy a barrel of Jack. Got excited. Found out it cost more than a new car...got unexcited. Sat longingly at the "bar" waiting to be served...but alas...

OMG! I forgot to mention the best part of the drive down: we stopped at Sonic!! YAY! Cherry Limeades!

We refrained from Sonic on the way back, as well, we were in search of a Mexican Food restaurant that was reputed to have THE best margaritas in town. I'm not entirely sure they were THE BEST, but they were pretty damn good....and huge. Gotta love fabulous and fabulously large margaritas!

We saw a noteworthy bumpersticker as we were leaving the restaurant: No Human Being is Illegal!

:)

As we headed back to the hotel, the sadness of what tomorrow would bring (going home) started to decend...but of course, we immediately lifted our spirits with discussion of where to go next year. Never too soon to start thinking about it!! Which reminds me, gotta do a bit of research for destinations. Any suggestions?

:-P SHEZ

Girls' Weekend--Day 2

GOOOOOD MORNING!

We were up and at'em pretty early (well, okay, maybe not that early), but we had a bit of a drive to breakfast and we were eager to get a move on.

Another gloriously warm day. Thankfully we were in Christi's convertible and the scenery was beautiful. Truly gorgeous! Say what you want about Tennessee, but it really is one of the most beautiful places I've been.

Our destination was the Loveless Cafe--best known for their biscuits, but lemme just tell you EVERYTHING we had was delicious. Again, because it's Girls' Weekend, we ordered mimosas in which we were brought a carafe of oj and small bottle of champagne for each of us. That's right EACH OF US. Since Christi was the designated driver, she had one glass of mimosa and Jamie and I dutifully finished her champagne. Click here for more info on the Loveless Cafe www.lovelesscafe.com If you're wondering where it is--and noticing on their website there is no city mentioned--well, that's because it's smack dab in the middle of nowhere, about an hour south of Nashville.

How did we know it was smack dab in the middle of nowhere? Well, we heard rumors that there was a cute little town not far (15ish miles) away (Franklin), so in search of adventure, off we go. Go. Go? hmm...just off the Natchez Trace Bridge, the volvo has decided that it doesn't like the heat or our drive or its alternator and it dies. SMACK DAB IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE.

After several non-productive calls to AAA, a very nice gentleman pulled over and talked to the towing company in Franklin, explaining that they needed to "get out here now and get these girls off the side of the road." Once he was satisfied the tow truck was on its way, he left. And so we sat. On the side of the road, surrounded by beauty. Melting in the heat.

Not even 10 minutes later (thank you kind sir, for stopping and talking to the towing company for us! because AAA gave us an ETA of an hour and God Bless small southern towns who drop everything to help a woman on the side of the road), Jimmy came to rescue us. I'm sure he was a little taken aback by his three "damsels" in distress...even more so, when we all piled (squeezed) into his truck for the ride back into town.

But within 3 minutes we had him wrapped around our little fingers and we got the full tour of downtown Franklin (which took all of 4 minutes...with traffic) and before leaving us at the Volvo dealership, made sure that we were well taken care of and would be fine (but left us his card, just in case!)

Of course, the Enterprise car rental office had just closed for the weekend and so we are now stuck in the middle of nowhere smack dab in the middle of Tennessee (oh wait, i already mentioned that). The dealership, upon hearing about our Girls' Weekend and that Jamie was in from Richmond and I was in from New York City and everything we have with us is at the Doubletree Downtown Nashville, put our car first and one of the associates drove us to the quaint little downtown area, whereby we found an irish pub and had a guiness (since we each had one would it be guini?) to assuage our nerves (well Christi's nerves for having a broken car! Jamie & I of course only drank in sympathy...). We strolled through the streets, did a bit of shopping, and voila! the dealership called to say that the car was ready and someone would come pick us up in a few minutes.

Soon we were back on our way to Nashville and a bit hungry (not to mention HOT!)...so we made it back to the hotel, sat in the air conditioning for a bit, changed, and then caught the shuttle bus to spend the rest of the evening on Broadway, eating BBQ, drinking Shiner Bock, and listening to the live music that Nashville is known for!

:-P SHEZ

Girls' Weekend--Day 1

Yes, shocking but true. Actual accounts of our Girls' Trip Nashville. Of course, under the pretense that "what happens on Girls' Weekend, stays on Girls' Weekend," I can't divulge it all, but there are a few notable highlights.

For example, Christi picked Jamie & I up at the airport and since we couldn't check into the hotel at that moment in time, we went out for margaritas...i mean Mexican food. If there happened to be a pitcher of tequila, triple sec, ice & lime juice on the table, well, then it would have been rude not to imbibe a little. besides....HELLO!...Girls' Weekend was about getting away from it all, neverminding the fact that it was 11am.

In our defense, we TRIED to tour the Capitol building, however, we couldn't find a parking spot. Yes, we looked and on our 3rd time around the area--and did I mention 103 degree heat??--we decided indoors with cool beverages was a better option at that moment in time.

After killing time at the restaurant, we found our hotel and were allowed to check in. So we drop our bags and headed down to Broadway, which is the main section for live music. We did a bit of shopping, a little walking, a little listening to live music, had a few more beers and then headed back to the hotel to get ready for dinner and the evening's festivities: The Grand Ole Opry.

I mean, c'mon, you can't go to Nashville and not go to the Opry. Having now been, I can skip it the next time I'm there, but it should be a stop for everyone at least once--whether or not country music is your thing. The early acts were, um, very, um...interesting. i'm not going to use the word hoaky, but, well, most would.

The most entertaining song BY FAR! was "Snuff Dipper" a love song by a gentleman about his wife and whose melody got stuck in our heads (in fact, i'm humming it now!). The outfits were also worth a mention (think HeeHaw and if you don't know what HeeHaw is, well then I am very sad for you!).

We did get to see Tracy Bird, Vince Gill, and Allison Kraus and Union Station, who were AAAAAA-MAZING! Lemme just recommend that if you ever have a chance to see Allison Kraus (preferably) with Union Station perform anywhere, GO! it's totally worth it.

All in all, it was a fun, relaxing day and with the promise of a deeeelicious breakfast Saturday morning, off to bed we went!

:-P SHEZ